life

1.

एक बात दिल में आई है,
आपका खुश रहना ही

आपके दुश्मनों के लिए

... सबसे बड़ी सजा है

तो हमेश खुश रहो

Teacher and Student

1.
Attitude------- ----------- :)


Teacher:- Write an essay on'If I am a millionaire'.


All students started writing except one boy
... ...
Teacher:- Why don't you start writing?

Boy:-

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.
.
.
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I am waiting for my secretary!
2.

Waqt Bhi Sikhata Hai,
Aur Teacher Bhi..
Par Dono Me Fark Hota Hai,
Teacher Sikha Kar Imtihan Leta
Hai,
Aur Waqt Imtihan Lekar Sikhata
Hai.

3.

A Good Teacher Is Who
Tells To Study Hard...

But...

A Best Teacher Is Who
Stands Outside the
Examination Hall and Shouts. . .

"OYE CHECKING WALE AA GAYE
APNI APNI PARCHIY CHUPA LO..."

4.

A 4 year Old kid kept telling his teacher about his baby sis who was going to be born,because he was very excited about it.
1 day his mom made him feel the baby's movements by placing his palm, on her stomach.
The kid didn't say anything. From that day onwards he stopped telling his teacher about his baby sis.
1 day when his teacher inquired about his baby sis. the boy's eyes were filled with tears.

He replied. My Mummy ate it! :

5.

Different types of Girlfriend fighting with their boyfriend...

Pilot's Girlfriend : Zyada ud Matt Samjha

Teacher's Girlfriend : Mujhe mat Sikhao Samjhe

Dentist's Girlfriend : Daant tod ke hath me de dungi

C.A.'S Girlfriend : Hisaab se reh samjha...

Engineer's Girlfriend : "Abey pehle Pass toh ho ja fir baat karna"

6.

Top Answers Of Teachers

If They Don't Know The Answers:

1)I Think The Question Is Wrong..

2)I Will Tell You Tomorrow..

3)Don't Ask Foolish Questions..

4)You Will Study This In The Next Class..

And The Most Important One Is:

5)Nice Question,Raise Your Hands Who Know The Answer :)

  7.

KG Boy: Mam, May I go to washroom?

Mam: Nhi, Pehle A to Z sunao fir jana,

Boy: ABCDEFGHIJKLMN__QRS_UVWX_Z,

Mam: P,O,T,Y kahan gai?

Boy: Ji Mere nikkar me nikal gai...

8.

Part 1
A girl came late in college.
Teacher:why u r late?
Girl:a guy was following me.
Teacher:so what
Girl:he was walking very slow.
Part 2
same girl comes late another day.
Teacher: why ur late 2day? Was dat guy following u slowly 2day also.
Girl: no sir,he came late 2day 2 follow me,so i was waiting 4 him,so got late.

 

 

 

 

 

Husband and Wife

1.

बीवी बनाते समय भगवान ने कहा : "अच्छी और समझदार बीवी दुनिया के हर कोने में मिलेगी "

और फिर भगवान ने दुनिया गोल बना दी ...
.
.
... .
.
अब ढूंढ लो ...
कोना ...

2.

Height Of Bachpana..

Innocent Kid : Mummy, mujhe bhai chahiye.
Mummy : Beta, Dad abroad gaye hai, jaise wo ayenge, hum baat karenge unse.
Kid : Aap unhe SURPRISE Q nahi deti ???

3.

Kid : Dada Jii Yeh FamiLY Planing kya h0ti hAi?

Dada : ChaL bhaaaaG!!! Mujhe nAhi Pata..!!

.
...
.

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Kid : Mai Jaanta thA BUDHE, TujhE nAhi pata...!!! :@

TujhE pata hOtA thO Aaj JaYedaad Ke 8 hIsSe Na hOte..
4.

A Five year old boy was try to write a letter

Dad: what are you writing my son?

Son: Love letter to my girlfriend
...
Dad: do u know how to write?

Son: No!! So what
She also doesn't know how to read
It's Love Dad you won't
Understand

5.

Wife: Can you help me in garden?
Husband: what do you think, i am a gardner??
Wife: Can you fix door handle?
Husband: What do you think, i m a carpenter?
In the evening when husband came from the work, he saw everything has been fixed. He asked wife who fixed this.
... ... Wife:Our neighbour. But he gave me 2 options. Either i should give him burger or a kiss.
Husband: I am sure you must have given a burger.
Wife:"What do u think, i am "McDonald's

6.

A woman was kidnapped, the kidnapper cut her finger and sent to her husband to ask money.
Husband replied
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.
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.
.
.
.

"I want more proof,
KHOPRI BHEJ KHOPRI.".......

 

Boys and Girls

1.

लड़के, जिनकी गर्लफ्रेंड होती है और जिनकी नहीं होती है,
में केवल एक फर्क होता है, पहले वाले लोग “लड़कियों से बात करते हैं”
और दूसरे वाले “लड़कियों के बारे में बात करते हैं”।

2.

A boy and a girl went for a walk.
While walking, the boy hits his leg to a stone & starts bleeding......


He looks at the girl hoping that she would tear her dupatta and wrap it around his leg.....
.
... .
.
.
.
The girl looks in his eyes and says......

"Sochiyo bhi mat hero! Ye mera Designer suit hai....:

Ladka apna result dekh ke..


Kya??????!!:o


Main fail ho gaya or vo bhi english mein?
...
..

..

..

..

..

..

UNPOSSIBLE!

3.

लड़का: रो क्यों रही हो??
लड़की: परीक्षा में मेरे बहुत कम नंबर आये हैं.
लड़का: बताओ कितने आये हैं?
लड़की: सिर्फ 99 %
लड़का: खुदा का खौफ कर ज़ालिम. इतने में तो 3 लड़के पास हो कर पार्टी दे रहे होते

4.

लडकाः हाय क्या कर रही हो तुम?
.
.
.
.
... .
लडकीः मैं बहुत थकी हुई हूँ आज बहुत काम किया है सोने जा रही हूँ और तुम क्या कर रहे हो?
.
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.
.
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लडकाः मैं विक्टोरिया पार्क मे हूँ और तुम्हारे पीछे खडा

5.

 

Pappu: Sister mujhe 1 Bottle blood
dedo.
.
.
Nurse: Blood Group bolo.
... .
.
Pappu: Koi bhi chalega...
.
.
Nurse: Kaise chalega!
.
.
Pappu: Girlfrnd ko love letter
likhna hai...
6.

लड़कियां एक दुसरे को गिफ्ट देती है...
.
.
.
परफयूम, इअरिंग ...
... सुट्स ...
फ्लोवर्स ...
चोकोलेट्स ...
और लड़के ..??
.
.
.
ये ले लड़की का नंबर ..
बस मेरा नाम नहीं आना चाहिए !!

 7.

अगर किसी लडके ने किसी लड़की से “हाय/हैलो” कहा है तो वो इसे केवल “हाय/हैलो” ही समझती है। इसके उल्टे अगरकिसी लड़की ने किसी लडके को “हैलो” कहा तो लड़का इसको केवल “हैलो” नहीं समझेगा। अगर लड़का “हैलो” को केवल “हैलो” समझना भी चाहेगा तो उसके दोस्त ऐसा नहीं होने देंगे, आख़िर दोस्त होते ही किस दिन के लिए हैं।

8.

A REALLY TOUCHING
STORY......


1 day 3 boys proposed a
Girl..
...
1st: I can die for you..
...
Girl- All people saying like this

2nd- I can bring star from
the sky

Girl- This is very old
dialogue

3rd- I can delete my facebook account for you...

Girl- (with tear on her eyes)
I will marry you and they
lived happily ever
after!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!

9.

लड़की लड़के से :- मेरा मोबाइल ज्यादा ममी के पास होता है
लड़का :- फिर तो हम पकडे जायेंगे

लड़की :- नहीं मेने तेरा नम्बर battery low के नाम से सेव किया है जब भी तेरा फ़ोन आता है तो ममी charging लगा कर चली जाती है

10.

Girl's FB Status -
Traveled in a BUS after such a long time.. ?
Comments:
-- Awwwww..muah..??
Maybe next time we both can go together sweetie..;-)
You went without me ?? :'( </ 3
Wow! I also wanna experience it
once..! :) ?
..
..
Boy's FB Status - Traveled in a BUS after such a long time.. :)
Comments:
-- Haan toh saale usme hum kya karein ??
Bas yehi aukaat hai teri !!
Saale ab tu rickshaw me jayega toh bhi status rakhega ??
Chuze baap ko bol ek cycle toh dila de kam se kam !!
Haan toh bhai ja..conductor ban jaa uska !!
..
..
Point to be noted: The boy got more
comments for a change !! ;)

11.

Woman Buys A New Sim
Card Puts It In Her Phone
And Decides To Surprise Her
Husband Who Is Seated On
The Couch In The Living Room.

She Goes To The Kitchen,
Calls Her Husband With
The New Number:

"Hello Darling"
The Husband Responds
In A Low Tone:

"Let Me Call U Back
Later Honey, The Dumb
Lady Is In The Kitchen..

12.

Girlz to Boyz
1970's : Love me, but don't touch me.
1980's : Touch me, but don't kiss me.
1990's : Kiss me, but don't do anything more.
2000's : Do anything, but don't tell anyone.
Since
2011 : Do everything , otherwise I will tell
everyone that you can't do anything.

13.

Girlfriend- Mein tumhare letters ke stamp tickets ko kiss karti hoon.

Unhe tumhare lips ne chua hoga.

Boyfriend- par mein toh unhe apne kutte ki naak se gila kar ke chipkata tha..!! :-)

14.

Boy: How many apples can you eat in empty stomach?
Girl: I can eat 6 apples.
Boy: you can eat only 1 apple in empty stomach,bcoz when you eat the 2nd apple that's not in empty stomach.
Girl: waow super joke I'll tell my friend.

Girl to Other Girl: How many apple can you eat in empty stomach?
Othe Girl: I can eat 10. Girl: Hatt yaar 6 bolti toh mast joke sunati

15.

3 Friends ek hi ghar me rahete they.
Ghar 100th floor pe tha.
1din teeno party se late night ghar pahunche.
LIFT kharab thi.
Golu: kya kare ?
Molu: ek kaam karte hai, story sunate hue chalte hai, jaldi pahunch jaayenge
Tolu : ok.
Molu ne 45th floor tak comedy movie ki story sunai.
Golu ne 99th floor tak Action movie ki story sunai.
Baat karte karte Ghar aa gaye
Golu: yar Tolu tune story nahi sunai , tu bhi suna
Tolu: Suno , HORROR MOVIE ----- GATE ki Chabhi gari mey bhul gaya...

16.

st BOY-ladki fasani ati hai?
2nd-na
1st-Seekh: pehle 1 kagaz ka jahaz bana
fir use class me uda de.
Jb Mem puche to ladki ka nam laga de
BAS FAS GAI LADKI...!

17.

Girl's FB Status -
Traveled in a BUS after such a long time.. ?
Comments:
-- Awwwww..muah..??
Maybe next time we both can go together sweetie..;-)
You went without me ?? :'( </ 3
Wow! I also wanna experience it
once..! :) ?
..
..
Boy's FB Status - Traveled in a BUS after such a long time.. :)
Comments:
-- Haan toh saale usme hum kya karein ??
Bas yehi aukaat hai teri !!
Saale ab tu rickshaw me jayega toh bhi status rakhega ??
Chuze baap ko bol ek cycle toh dila de kam se kam !!
Haan toh bhai ja..conductor ban jaa uska !!
..
..
Point to be noted: The boy got more
comments for a change !! ;)

18.

Boy o girl on bed: Is this your first time?
girl (angrily): Of Course, it is!!!
Why do all you guys ask the same questions????

19.

Definition of LOVE

A serious disorder of Heart due to Relationship
between Men&Women that can cause Death
of 1 or Both depending on the resistance associated..!!

TYPES:
1 sided
&2 sided

AGE:
Usually occurs in teenagers,
but nowdays can be found in any age..!

SYMPTOMS:
Tension
Daydreaming
Insomnia
Phone Addiction
DIAGNOSIS BY:
Diary
Photos
Mobile

TREATMENT:
Anti-LOVE therapy by Father's Shoe
or Mother's Sandle.

20.

Boy o girl on bed: Is this your first time?
girl (angrily): Of Course, it is!!!
Why do all you guys ask the same questions????

 

 

 

 

Santa Banta

1.

ऑफिसर (संता से) - मोबाइल और लैंड लाइन में क्या अंतर है?
संता - यही कि मोबाइल में नंबर अंगूठे से डायल करते हैं और लैंड लाइन में उंगली से।

2.

Santa ki tapasya se khush ho kar bhagwan bole-
.
.
'VAR MANGO VATS'
.
... .
.
Santa-prabhu ! jaisa aap soch rhe he mein vaisa nahi hu...
.
.
.
'MUJHE VADHU CHAHIYE'................:D :D

3.

Teacher: What is half of 8 ?
Rajnikant: 4
Santa: Depnd karta hai agar horizantaly aadha karo to '0'
or verticly karo toh '3'......
1st tym rajni lost santa rocks....:)

4.

संता इन आर्ट गेलरी

संता -इस भयानक तस्वीर को आप मोर्डन आर्ट कहते हो ...
आर्ट डीलर -मेरे बाप तू दिमाग मत लगा .....ये आइना है

5.

A Chinese was in hospital.
his friend SANTA went to meet him.
Chinese said "CHING CHONG, MOU.CHU CHA" & died.
SANTA went china 2 know the meaning,
that was:-
KUTTE OXYGN Ke PIPE SE PER Utha.

6.

Santa Ko Cinema Hall Ke BaharEk Bikhari Mila.

Bhikhari: “ Allah Ke Naam Par Kuch De Do ”

Santa 100 Ka Note Dikhate Hue Bola: “

Kya Tumhare Paas 50 Ka Note Hai? ”

Bhikhari Khushi Se : “ Ji Hain”

Santa: “ To Sale, Pehle Woh Jake Kharch Kar Na “

7.

Santa roti kha raha tha, aur baaju me baithi murghi ko bhi roti khila raha tha.

BANTA:- tu kya kar raha hai ?

SANTA:- aaj mera birthday hai, isliye chicken ke saath roti kha raha hu

 

 

 

 

 

General

1.
इंटेलिजेंस ब्यूरो में नौकरी के लिए इंटरव्यू
इंटेलिजेंस ब्यूरो में एक उच्च पद के लिए
भर्ती की प्रक्रिया चल रही थी। अंतिम
तौर पर केवल तीन उम्मीदवार बचे थे
जिनमें
... से किसी एक का चयन किया जाना था।
इनमें दो पुरुष थे और एक महिला। पहले
आदमी को एक कमरे में ले जाकर
परीक्षक ने उसके हाथ में एक बंदूक पकड़ाई
और दूसरे कमरे की ओर इशारा करते हुये
कहा - ''उस कमरे में तुम्हारी पत्नी बैठी है।
जाओ और उसे गोली मार दो।'' ''मैं
अपनी पत्नी को किसी भी हालत में
गोली नहीं मार सकता''- आदमी ने कहा।
''तो फिर तुम हमारे किसी काम के
नहीं हो। तुम जा सकते हो।'' - परीक्षक ने
कहा।
अब दूसरे आदमी को बुलाया गया। उसके हाथ
में एक बंदूक पकड़ाई और दूसरे कमरे की ओर
इशारा करते हुये कहा - ''उस कमरे में
तुम्हारी पत्नी बैठी है। जाओ और उसे
गोली मार दो।'' आदमी उस कमरे में
गया और पांच मिनट बाद आंखों में आंसू
लिये वापस आ गया। ''मैं
अपनी प्यारी पत्नी को गोली नहीं मार
सका। मुझे माफ कर दीजिये। मैं इस पद के
योग्य नहीं हूं।'' अब अंतिम उम्मीदवार के
रूप में केवल
महिला बची थी। उन्होंने उसे भी बंदूक
पकड़ाई और उसी कमरे की तरफ
इशारा करते
हुये कहा उस कमरे में तुम्हारा पति बैठा है।
जाओ और जाकर उसे गोली से उड़ा दो।''
महिला ने बंदूक ली और कमरे के अंदर
चली गई। कमरे के अंदर घुसते ही फायरिंग
की आवाजें आने लगीं । लगभग 11 राउंड
फायर के बाद कमरे से चीखपुकार, उठापटक
की आवाजें आनी शुरू हो गईं। यह क्रम
लगभग पन्द्रह मिनटों तक चला उसके बाद
खामोशी छा गई। लगभग पांच मिनट बाद
कमरे का दरवाजा खुला और माथे से
पसीना पोंछते हुये महिला बाहर आई।
बोली - ''तुम लोगों ने मुझे
बताया नहीं था कि बंदूक में कारतूस
नकली हैं। मजबूरन मुझे उसे पीट-पीट कर
मारना पड़ा


2.

IN 2018.,
.
.
BIKHARI : Bhagwan k naam pe
kuch de de.
... .
... ENGINEER : Ye le meri B.tech ki
degree rakh le.
.
BIKHARI : Tjhe chahiye to meri
M.tech ki rakh le.
3.

हाथी की सूँड लंबी क्यों होती है ?
.
.
.
.
... .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
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.
.
.
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ताकि वो अपनी बीबी को दूर से चूम सके।
4.

Aaj jab wo mujse mili toh boli "Kya hume yaad krte ho..??
..
..
..
..
... ..
..
..
..

Ab Unhe kaun bataye ke yaad krna itna asaan
hota to hum apni class me top na
kar lete..!! ;)
5.

Bahut dino se apne Dosto ko Bhul gaya tha,
.
-
parso,


... .
.
.
.
'Star Gold'
pe 'NAMAK HARAM' dekhi to
sale sab ke sab yaad aa gaye.
6.

Degrees of girls!
B.A.-Beautiful Angel
B.E.-Beautiful Eyes
B.Sc.-Beautiful Structure
B.Com-Beautiful Communication
M.B.A.-Married But Awesome!

 

7.

KID: why some of your hair is white DAD?

Dad: Everytime u make me unhappy, 1 of my hair turns white.

KID: Now I understand y grandpa's has only white hair!

 

8.

On the set of KBC...
A guy got stuck on a Rs. 1 crore question.
He uses phone-a-friend, and chooses
his girlfriend to ask the answer.
Amitabh: Hey, you've got 30 seconds
to answer and your time starts now!
Boy reads out the question and the 4 options.
Girl: Mil gaya time tumhe phone karne ka?
Mujhe tumse koi baat nahi karni! Byeee!

9.

KG Boy: Mam, May I go to washroom?

Mam: Nhi, Pehle A to Z sunao fir jana,

Boy: ABCDEFGHIJKLMN__QRS_UVWX_Z,

Mam: P,O,T,Y kahan gai?

Boy: Ji Mere nikkar me nikal gai...

10.

Thoughts in this marriage season

Arrange Marriage Ke Kharche

Rs. 3,00,000 Shadi par
Rs. 3,00,000 Jewellry per & Kapadee and
Rs. 50,000 Shadi ke Rasmo per
means Shadi ke 3 Dino ka Kharcha, Rs.6,50,000
Yani Shadi ke

1 din ka kharcha Rs. 216666.66
1 Ghante ka Rs.9027.78
or
1 Minute Ka Rs.150.46

Ufff.... Tauba Tauba....

Now Love Marriage Ke Kharche…

Sirf 100 Rs. Ka Stamp
20 Rs. Ki Notery
50 Rs. Ki Varmaala
10 Rs. Ke Photo
Total Rs. 180

to
Paisa Aap ka
Pasand Aap ki
Faisla Aap ka

”Jago Grahak Jago”

Aur

Apne Lover ke Sath Bhago…

11.

There are 3 kind of Men..
Do you know...?

1-The JAPANESE-
They have 1 wife & 1 girlfriend but they love their wife the most.

2-The AMERICANS-
They have 1 wife & 1 girlfriend but they love their girlfriend the most.

3-The INDIAN-
They have 1 wife & 4 girlfriends but they love their house-maid the most...

12.

12 Boys planned to propose to a girl

10 came with a rose..
But 1 came with a ring – Thats confidence

But what about the other 1?
Wo sala baraat lekar aaya – OVER CONFIDENCE!

13.

Jyotish ji: mujhe kaise pata chal sakta he ki mera beta future me kya
banega?
JYOTISHI: aap uske table pe Cigarette,
Beer,
Paiso ki Gaddi
or Books rakh do, Unme se jo wo uthaega
usse pata chalega...

DAD: ok Agle din Beta Aaya,
Table dekhi.
Paiso ki Gaddi uthake jeb mein rakhi,

Cigarette pi,
Beer chhupa li,
or Books hath me leke ghar se chala gaya...

DAD: Us nalayak ne to sab kuch le liya!

JYOTISHI: Sir, Mubarak Ho!
Aapka beta ' ENGINEER' banega..:

14.

Daughter : Dad Im Lesbian

Dad: Oh okay

2nd Daughter: I'm Also Lesbian

Dad: OMG! Dosen't Anyone From This Family Love MEN?

Son: Dad.... I Do .. :P :D

15.

A japanese came to INDIA...

He took an autto to go to the airport

on the way a honda overtakes

Japanese:- HONDA made in JAPAN..... very fast

next a toyota overtakes

Japanese:- TOYOTA made in JAPAN.....very fast

Airport came he asked how much??
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Santa:-RS. 8000

Japanese:- why so expensive??

Santaram Chaudhary:-METER made in JAPAN ........very fast.!!..

Japanese shocks Santa Rocks!

16.

1 Aadmi ne hotel ke room mein computer dekha to socha ke wife ko mail kar doon.

Jaldi mein mail galat address par send ho gaee.

Jis Orat ko Mail maili us ke Shohar ka 2 din pehly inteqal hua tha.

Mail Padte hi Orat Behosh hogaee,Likha tha Begum Me Kheriyat se Pohunch

Gya hoon Idhar Net bhi Mojud he,Jaga Choti Par Shandaar Hai,Thandi Thandi Hawa

Jannat Ka Maza Deti Hai.Dhool Matti Nahi Hai,Mene Jo White Kaprre Pehne Thy Wo

Ab Tak White Hian,Kal Hi Tumhy bhi Bulwa Lunga.

17.

KID: why some of your hair is white DAD?

Dad: Everytime u make me unhappy, 1 of my hair turns white.

KID: Now I understand y grandpa's has only white hair!

18.

A 4 year Old kid kept telling his teacher about his baby sis who was going to be born,because he was very excited about it.
1 day his mom made him feel the baby's movements by placing his palm, on her stomach.
The kid didn't say anything. From that day onwards he stopped telling his teacher about his baby sis.
1 day when his teacher inquired about his baby sis. the boy's eyes were filled with tears.

He replied. My Mummy ate it! :

19.

Thoughts in this marriage season

Arrange Marriage Ke Kharche

Rs. 3,00,000 Shadi par
Rs. 3,00,000 Jewellry per & Kapadee and
Rs. 50,000 Shadi ke Rasmo per
means Shadi ke 3 Dino ka Kharcha, Rs.6,50,000
Yani Shadi ke

1 din ka kharcha Rs. 216666.66
1 Ghante ka Rs.9027.78
or
1 Minute Ka Rs.150.46

Ufff.... Tauba Tauba....

Now Love Marriage Ke Kharche…

Sirf 100 Rs. Ka Stamp
20 Rs. Ki Notery
50 Rs. Ki Varmaala
10 Rs. Ke Photo
Total Rs. 180

to
Paisa Aap ka
Pasand Aap ki
Faisla Aap ka

”Jago Grahak Jago”

Aur

Apne Lover ke Sath Bhago…

20.

Maths Magic:
ur Cell number's
last digit,
x 2,
+ 5,
x 50,
+ ur age,
+ 365,
&
- 615.
The last number is ur age and 1st number is ur cell's last number number... TRY IT!

21.

Bhagwan ne mujse bola ki tu apna ek pyara dost chod de main tujhe Cell dunga,
2 ko chodh de to"fast track"ki ghadi dunga,
5 ko chodh de 5 lakh dunga,
aur sabhi dosto ko chodh de to FERRARI dunga.
Maine bhagwan ko dekha aur kaha ki:
BHAGWAN, YE DOST WO HAI JINHONE MERI HAR KHUSHI HAR GHAM MEIN SAATH DIYA...
MERE BACHPAN SE LEKAR AAJ TAK MERE SAATH RAHE...
KABHI MAIN ROYA TO APNE HAATHON SE ANSU POCHHE...
EK GLASS PANI BHI PIYA TO BHI MERE SAATH SHARE KIYE...
MERI EK AWAAZ PAR DAUDE CHALE AYE,
AUR AAP KEHTE HAI KI MAIN EK FERRARI KE LIYE INHE CHODH DU?
KHAIR KOI BAAT NAHI,
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"FERRARI RED COLOUR KI HI HONI CHAIYE..!!";-)

22.

Old but Gold

Only for Samajhdaar:
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TEACHER : "Aisi kaun si cheej hai, jise tum roj dekh sakte ho par chhu nahin Sakte..?"

Student : "Rahne do Madam Aap naraz ho jayengi..